One step forward, two steps back

Haii~ Having some major writer’s block at the moment. Can’t seem to focus on doing my essays at all, and when i do try, the attention is only very limited. I’ve done reading about the same parts so many times but from different textbooks and its just so confusing. I thought i made progress with the whole essay writing thing when i finally completed my first consciousness essay, and i felt like i was equipped with the correct tools to tackle the two next essays, but it turns out that’s not even remotely true. It feels like i’ve just regressed and gone backwards, instead of becoming more efficient i’ve become less and less productive. And the worst thing is i have no idea how to fix it.

If only writing the damn essay came as easily as blogging, every word just flowing out effortlessly. I suppose it beats sitting an exam. Actually i think the looming deadlines have hindered me instead of making me work better, even though i used to be so good at working under pressure.

The fact that i know i won’t be getting a break for a long time just makes me want to rebel and stop being productive altogether. I have two essays due in for the last week of term, one due for the 15th and the other on the 18th. 18th being the day i break up for christmas holidays. To make matters worse i only get two weeks off for christmas this year and i have to spend it writing yet another essay that’s due in the first week back. Over christmas i’d also have to work on writing the draft of my dissertation which is due some time in February and then the final dissertation is due in March. When all that is done, it will be time to start revising for exams. It feels like i won’t even have a moment to stop and take a breath!

I’m in desperate need of an escape, for fear of going insane!

β™₯ Veronica ~x

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